Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Something I notice often...

While sitting at a traffic light, find something that will occupy your hands, "DON'T PICK YOUR DAMNED NOSE." Have fun, be safe.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

My Comment Regarding Dallas County Scrounging for 'loose change'

Originally posted at Grits For Breakfast:

"Dallas County scrounging for "loose change' on jail costs but ignores potential savings from jailing fewer people. The Dallas News in a column titled 'Hits and Misses' (Aug. 16) labeled as a miss this suggestion from Dallas County for making ends meet on the backs of jail inmates:..."

SUPER C.O.P's comment

"One way Dallas County is trying to scrounge for loose change is taking the take-home cars from Dallas County Constables and having them park at designated areas to save gas. My question is, will the elected officials give up their car allowances? That will save money! Also, Dallas County has the lowest tax rate in the whole state. If they would raise the tax a half cent, we wouldn't be in such a deficit. At the City Council Meetings, they tell people we can raise the taxes but they don't tell them how much is actually needed. When people hear "raising taxes" they think a large amount, not knowing it only a half cent to take care of the $40,000,000 deficit."

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Medical Emergencies do not include the runs!

My brother called and asked me to blog this. Apparently he stopped some guy in Dallas today who said he was speeding because he had a medical emergency. When asked what his medical emergency was, he said he had "the runs."

Announcement from a Cop on Patrol: "Medical emergencies do not include the shits."
Ok. I said it.

If you have the runs/shits or anything that resembles this, don't speed and expect to use that lame assed medical emergency excuse when you get caught. Instead, just exit to the nearest McDonald's or Walmart. You don't have to be a germaphobe to fear these rest rooms, but if you have the runs it's better to be there than in your car. Besides, it's probably where you picked up your germs in the first place. Didn't wash your f@#$*! hands! Don't make your nasty problem bigger by telling cops you have an emergency when you don't..

Here are the rules:
Do you want an ambulance?
No = ticket.
Yes = ambulance ride and towed car if there is no other driver.

Unless you're a Rabbi in Quebec, speeding because of a botched circumcision is generally not a medical emergency. "Tell it to the judge."

Tha end.

Not exactly the end. One more thing:


Question: If you have extreme diarrhea while driving, is it ok to run from the police?
Click here for the answer:

Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do?
Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?

All criminals in COPS are innocent until chased to death and ridiculed to death before the millions of COPS viewers.. even before they every appear in a court of law.

Monday, August 11, 2008

How Not To Get Your Ass Kicked By the Police..

Chris Rocks explains....

Stetsons and Bowie Knives

Ok. I must admit, I miss that my brother is no longer a Trooper. There is/was an air of distinction about him, aesthetically speaking. Yeah yeah, I'm a girl and I love guys in uniform, but, to tell the truth, it was that cowboy hat. Otherwise referred to as the Stetson. Technically speaking, any form of head gear made by Stetson can be called a Stetson, but around these parts, I guess when you say Stetson, the immediate image that comes to mind are Texas Troopers and the Texas Rangers (and I don't mean the baseball team). We're not hicks.. But these hats do make a good lookin' man.. look gooder!

When my brother was a Trooper, the story goes, he never took off his hat. Even when he was driving his patrol car. And other Troopers knew he meant business if they saw him taking it off, when face:face (imminent confrontation) with a motorist.

At any rate, I love my brother and the decision he's made to serve and defend the public. It is dangerous out there. I remember driving southbound on the DNT, with my mother in the car, and we come upon a Trooper in his patrol car, stopped in the middle lane with flashers blinking.. to keep traffic out of the lane.. Someone had dropped a sofa on the tollway and kept going. As I passed the car to the left I realized it was brother. My was frantic and wanted me to call him and tell him to get out of the middle of the street. I did. He laughed. We kept going.

And I can't tell you how many times I've seen my brother standing on the side of the road, investigating and accident or "face:face" with a motorist. And I'm always glad to hear him tell about it! That's the good part. Hearing HIM tell about it. He didn't really like being a Trooper on the DNT. Maybe if he'd been on the highway he'd still be there. Maybe not. It's a dangerous job. But we get our laughs. Watch plenty of COPS and Dallas SWAT and other none-sensical t.v. cops shows and such.. and I learn so much from him, like that rule about ignorance of the law not being an excuse. Come on, now! Do you think, if I'd known that tapping my breaks when someone is tale-gating me, was against the law, that I would have been doing it? What I should do is get me a Bowie Knife and mount that sucker on my dashboard! Then start waving that thing around in rush hour traffic. Would that incite road rage or prevent it? Hmmmmmm.. I have to think on that.